It is peculiar looking at photos of me from before 2011. I see myself looking rounder than I am now but I don’t recall feeling bad about the way I looked or who I was. There is one set of photos in particular, where I was probably at my non-pregnant heaviest, and I know that I felt content and great about myself that day.
If you are following Make It Look Easy you might have noticed that I had something to say about body image this morning.
My Facebook newsfeed has become a constant barrage of body image related stuff and it is driving me nuts, I’ve been deleting and unliking left, right and centre.
How is it that so much of how a woman feels about herself is supposed to be related to what her body looks like without clothes on. Perhaps it’s because there are entire industries built around women’s perception and self perception and it works in their favour for ‘poor body image’ to be a thing.
Why do we not spruik about negative intellectual image? Through both genetics and socio-demographics each of us starts life intellectually in a certain place. Through a series of events, called life, stuff happens. Dependant on your personal goals, investment in yourself, support network and sheer determination, amongst other things, you can change your path forward.
I don’t see airbrushed images on social media proclaiming that a uni degree is the new welfare payment. I suspect that the size and marketability of the education industry compared to the diet and fitness industry has a whole lot to do with it. The diet and fitness industries thrive on ‘negative female body image’ and you know what, dependant on your personal goals, investment in yourself, support network and sheer determination, amongst other things, you can change the way your body looks too.
There is a constant stream of criticism directed, largely, at the media and fashion industry for portraying ‘ideal’ women that give the rest of us mere mortals body image issues. I realise I’m putting myself on a slippery slope when I suggest that nobody nice actually gets up and says that women need to look that way, it’s more a pressure that we put on ourselves. If you have someone in your life who suggests that you are less of a person because you don’t look a certain way then perhaps you need to take a long hard look at whether you need them around.
I feel that the line become good body image and good health has become blurred. I’m potentially going to slide a bit more by saying that I don’t think it is okay use body image as an excuse for poor health choices. These things should be mutually exclusive. It is entirely possible to feel great about the way you look but be completely unhealthy, that goes for people of all sorts of shapes and sizes. Likewise you can be the picture of health and still not love the way you look.
We women really are such a complicated species, it’s no wonder most men can’t hope to understand us.
Earlier in the year I remember a bit of hullabaloo about the expectations placed on a Victoria’s Secret model in the lead up to a runway show. There was a fair whack of criticism but the reality is those ladies on the catwalk are fit, healthy and blessed with a genetic, and probably socio-demographic, background that make it easier for them to look like that compared to a different subset of the population. Looking like that takes a hell of a lot of hard work and targeted nutrition and it would be immensely difficult to do so living on water and lettuce leaves and never exercising.
Anyway, I digress. I watched and I was impressed. I didn’t see flashing signs saying that is the way we are all expected to look. I must have missed the memo somewhere along the line that society as a whole expects my body to look a certain way. I know I certainly don’t place that expectation on myself or other women. However, I know I am in the minority in that respect and I have been putting a lot of thought in to why that is.
I think that the need to ‘promote positive body image’ is acknowledging that there is a way that women are ‘supposed’ to look. To me our actual body shape and size is an outcome of genetics, what we eat, exercise, sleep, emotional wellbeing and other things, some of them beyond our control. Instinctively I think we know the difference between feeling healthy and not. When we know that we aren’t eating a balanced diet, are over indulging a little too often, not exercising regularly or sleeping enough our bodies suffer.
I know that I feel significantly different internally when I have been eating more sugar or drinking more alcohol than usual, not eating enough fresh veggies and not exercising as often as I would like to. It means I feel less comfortable in my body because I don’t have the same feeling of wellness as usual. This is exacerbated if I’m not getting enough sleep or having my head not quite in the right place. I might look in the mirror and give myself a kick up the bum to get my eating and/or exercise in order, for me, but it’s not because I feel I should look different it’s because I want to feel different internally. Engaging in a mental war with yourself about the way your body looks it is not conducive to getting back to a comfortable balance
Where is this going and what am I getting at? The message I am aiming to get across is simple. Setting goals around the size and shape of your body is a headfuck, it is actually not something that you can completely control so attempting too is madness.
- Concentrate on eating a balanced diet of fresh and whole foods, keep processed foods, refined sugar and alcohol for sometimes.
- Exercise regularly; there is overwhelming evidence to say it is good for you.
- Get enough sleep, that makes the first two things a whole lot easier.
Look in the mirror and see the things that make you who you are, such a small percentage of that should come from what you look like naked but, if you love what you see, that’s only going to heighten how you feel about the rest.
If you love cake, then god damn well eat it, just make sure it's good cake!
I love this comment shared on my Make It Look Easy post. Words to live by I say, thankyou Naomi.
I open up the floor to you, what do you think?
