I've had a few friends ask me for tips on getting kids to eat a variety of foods recently so I figured it might make a good blog post. I apologise in advance if you are reading this and do have a picky eater I may well sound critical of some things that you do do, it's not a personal attack, it's just the way I see things.
Sit down to meals together (with the TV off) this is essential, it is my number one.
Eating with adults teaches children about eating and niceties like chewing with your mouth closed, how to hold (and use) a knife and fork (although somehow Lillian still doesn't have full grasp of this concept!). It also encourages family conversation, I ask each child (often for the second time) about their day and we chat about all sorts of things. I know that this isn't possible in every home every night but I encourage you to set aside a few meals each week that are to be eaten as a family. Sunday lunch anyone?
I believe that there are no 'picky' eaters, we all just have our favourites.
When I'm in Adelaide and the opportunity arises to have some takeaway without the kids I will get the same dish from the same restaurant every time. It's my favourite.
When Steven and I have our 'date night' dinners I will cook one of two things everytime. We can't go past them.
On that basis, you could call me picky.
When kids are little there is no doubt that they have their favourite foods, and wouldn't we all love to eat our favourites all the time. I don't know about you but all of my children would prefer a chocolate frog than an apple, so if they know there are chocolate frogs in the cupboard chances are they will refuse the apple and ask for the frog...you get my drift?
From the outside Sebastian would appear to be my 'pickiest' eater. Hands down. If I serve up anything for dinner that isn't burritos (they are his favourite and he asks for them every single night and then complains when that's not what lands on the table at dinner time) he'll say he doesn't like it. Ironically, despite his constant declarations of not liking, he is usually the one who enjoys what ever I served the most...and with the exception of Charlotte he is the one most likely to clear his plate. All it takes is a little perseverance and encouragement on our part.
Don't 'tell' your child that they are a picky eater. Let them decide if they want to try something new for themselves. Trying new things is one of the best things about being a food lover.
Too often I hear a parent describing their child as a picky eater in front of them, or worse declaring their child won't like something when it is offered and before the child has had a chance to try it and decide for themselves. This brings me back to the learned behaviour, of course a child is going to be a 'picky' eater if they have just been effectively told by their parent that they are.
Just make one meal and don't let eating it become a stressful experience.
As a food lover I always wanted my kids to be food lovers too and, consequently, I serve up the same meal to everyone each night...the exception being that one night a week when Steven and I like to have a 'date night' with our own meal on the couch in front of the TV. If they don't want whatever is served up at dinner time, well they won't starve. In saying that it is really important that dinner time isn't stressful because little Jonny won't eat his carrots. Nonchalance about whether they eat or not coupled with encouragement to 'have a few more bites' is essential. Be mindful that whether or not a child eats something is a way that they can control a situation.
If Sebastian is being a bit difficult we will ask that he eats a certain number of mouthfuls (usually 5, it depends on how much he has eaten already). It is a useful strategy when there is something he does like that he wants more of. With the older girls they don't get anything else on their plates until they have eaten what they were served.
There are things that kids genuinely don't like but tastebuds do change.
I've seen a look of absolute revulsion cross Lil's face as she's eaten a mouthful of pumpkin before. loathe and despise custard, just the smell makes me feel ill. My sister Lauren doesn't like olives and mushrooms, she still tries them when I put them in food by accident but she just doesn't like them. However, tastes do change and, like Lil I reviled pumpkin as a kid but it's my favourite vegetable now. I have no doubt you would have heard about intriducing foods over and over with babies.
Take a look at your own eating habits
Like the table manners your kids will pick up alot from what you like. If you say you don't like vegetables well, chances are, they won't like them either. I was brought up believing that brussel sprouts were the root of all evil (my mum despises them). I decided I wanted to try some, so I bought them, consulted Stephanie Alexander (Cook for 8 minutes in lots of boiling water), and I love them.
Likewise the eating habits that our kids develop and are exposed to when they are small will stay with them for a long time. In our house foods are generally referred to as being 'good for your body' or treats. I never refer to foods as being 'naughty' and, with 3 girls, I would hate for them to develop an unhealthy relationship with food and their bodies.
If you currently have lots of processed food in your diet (think frozen meals, jar sauces etc) fresh foods probably won't taste so good to your kids because the processed stuff is high in sugar and salt.
Cook things the way they are supposed to be cooked.
So often I hear people saying that they can't cook. That's nonsense. If food is cooked badly then of course it won't taste so good. The Stephanie Alexander Cooks Companion is a fabulous volume for consulting on individual ingredients. Bill Granger's cookbooks are definitely my favourites for simple, tasty, everyday offerings. Simply Bill and Everyday are particularly food splattered. I find Donna Hay's meals to be a little on the bland side but her baking recipes are fabulous. Kylie Kwong's Simple Chinese Cooking is particularly awesome, especially if you love chinese food (my kids love love Asian Flavours). Simply Italian by Sophie Braimbridge (if you can find a copy) has excellent, yummy recipes. Jamie's Ministry of Food is a book dedicated to people who think they can't cook. From memory he talks about choosing a few things and doing them well.
Get your kids involved with the cooking process
Let them choose meals from cookbooks and, as they get older, let them help with getting dinner. I've baked with all of my kids for as long as I can remember. I started the girls out with vegetable peeling and they have graduated as far as cooking whole meals. Make sure you have enough time and are prepared to cope with more mess than usual.
Cooking is a fantastic skill for kids to have, not only do recipes provide so many learning opportunities (literacy, numeracy, language) the ability to cook something on their own is also an enormous confidence booster for kids. Baking a cake, for example, is such a quick and easy way of providing a child with a 'gee I'm good, look what I did' moment
Talk to your child about their likes and dislikes. Build on the things that they enjoy.
Gaining an understanding for why your child won't try, or appears not to like certain things will really help to introduce new things onto their plates and into their bellies. Refer to food in terms of all the senses ask them about how it looks, feels, smells and sounds as well as how it tastes.
Personally, I am a very tactile person. Crunch is my favourite texture, adding a crunchy element to a dish just makes it so much more appealing for me (think nuts in a stirfry, a crispy top on the lasagne or a crispy pastry top on a stew turned pie).
Turning a meat and vegetable meal into a warm salad is a fantastic way of introducing lots of sensory elements into what would otherwise be a potentially boring plate of food. Baby spinach or rocket are my usual 'salad' elements with everything brought together with a simple lemon juice or vinegar + olive oil + (sometimes) mustard vinegrtte. Warm salads are a huge favourite in our house. Not everyone always eats their green stuff but they will fight over the lentils at the bottom of the bowl. You can turn pretty much anything into a warm salad, limited only by your imagination.
Give them choices
Whilst it's pretty rare for there to be a whole lot of choices at dinner time my kids do get plenty of opportunities to choose what they eat during the day. They usually have 4 or so cereals to choose from in the morning and there is always toast for bread. They get an opportunity to choose what they have on their sandwich and which piece of fruit and other snacks they have.
Limit the amount that they eat in the late afternoon and make dinner time reasonable and constant.
Our ideal dinner time is 6pm, I've recently moved it forward to 5.30pm due to the problems we have been having get J to bed of an evening. When we walk through the door after school pick up the kids are allowed to have a piece of fruit and one other snack. If they are still 'desperately' hungry they are allowed a second piece of fruit. If they eat more than that they don't eat their dinner. They always ahve easy access to water and are encouraged to drink plenty of it. That is all they drink with the exception of a glass of milk or juice in the morning and an occacional hot chocolate or milkshake in the afternoon as a special treat.
Share or serve food on a platter to the table
I find that serving dinner to the table unplated, on a serving platter from time to time is fun for the kids. It gives them an opportunity to serve themselves and choose what goes on their plates (within reason).
On afternoons when I am particularly organised I'll make them a shared afternoon tea, they love this. Sebastian always eats more fruit this way than any other.
Take them out to eat and don't let them choose from the kids menu
Taking children out to eat is a great way to encourage them to try new things and work on approriate eating out behaviours. Treat it as a fun family experience. Talk about our surroundings. Don't bring their DS's or any colouring in things. If the colouring in things are provided by the resturant great, use them, but draw pictures and colour in with them.
Most kids menu's are littered with fried foods, avoid them. Ask for a childs serve of something off the regular menu or better still share a few dishes between all of you. Greek, Turkish, Asian, Indian, Spanish and Mexican are perfect cuisines for sharing.
Just because they are kids doesn't mean they won't like a bit of spice.
Our kids all eat food with chilli in it. Steven and I love spicy food so I have slowly built up a chilli tolerance and that they rarely describe their food as being too spicy. Sebastian is so far gone he can match Steven and I in the chilli stakes without a word and his sushi pick is spicy tuna, I kid you not.
Use different herbs and spices in your cooking, educate yourself and your kids about them, grow some herbs in pots on your kitchen window sill.
Don't use dessert as encouragement for finishing their main meal and it's not always essential that they clear their plate.
Dessert is rarely served in our house. On those occasions it is available the kids usually don't know it's coming and they get it whether they have eaten all of their main meal or not. It is important not to use dessert as a 'reward' for eating less appealing foods.
Likewise, if your child hasn't eaten everything on their plate, and they have had enough, that's fine. It's healthy to stop eating when you're full. Just make sure that they understand they won't be getting anything else to eat after dinner.
Wow...I didn't expect to write such a long volume...I've pulled out the main tips and made them stand out so you don't have to read all of my words!
I'd love to hear what your kids' favourite dinners are, I'm always looking for new things that mine will LOVE! Don't forget you can share this with your friends easily (if you've found it useful) with the facebook and twitter buttons below. You can also follow me on facebook easily too if you are keen to chat more!
Tatum xx