My New 23

Age is a funny thing.

Chantelle, AKA Fat Mum Slim, posted last week about only being as old as you feel, and I couldn’t agree more.

It’s my birthday in just over a week so, naturally, it’s a time for reflection about the year behind me and the new year ahead

For the longest time I think I’ve felt somewhere around 23 in my head.  At times I am stunned at the realisation we have a nearly 10 year old.  Where did that time go?

Music always takes me back to years earlier and suddenly I’m 18 again in my mind. 

When I am standing in crowd, much like I was on the train this morning, I often wonder about how old I appear to other people.

Do I look like a nearly 34 year old mother of 4, wife of 11 ½ years, mining engineer, blogger and crafter who loves running, reading, travelling, fashion, good food, good company and generally enjoys being happy.  Or do I look like someone else?

When I read Chantelle’s post I commented that I feel about 23 in my head.  I have for a long time.  I often find it difficult to assimilate the fact that I am a grownup person, responsible for 4 little people.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t begrudge it in the slightest, it is part of my core and I love it, it’s where we want to be right now.  Sometimes it’s just hard to comprehend how it could have possibly happened so fast.

The funny thing is, in reflection it occurred to me that I actually don’t feel 23 anymore. 

I’m an entirely different person to who I was when I was 23.  In essence the main two differences are that I know myself much better than I did 10 years ago and, probably as a result of that, I am a much more confident person.

I have made mistakes, I’ve learned and grown from them.  I’m certain I will make more but I hope that I will learn and grow from them too.

I’ve become more compassionate and understanding of others, I am good at it even, my favourite ever manager told me that once.  It made me feel proud.  I have a better handle on when to offer my opinion and when to keep my mouth shut and just listen.  I don’t worry a whole lot about how other people view me, I’m not sure if that is entirely a good thing or not?  It's just that I am who I am; I know that I am an open and genuinely giving person. 

I’m living my life, not just simply putting one foot in front of the other to just get through from one day to the next, there are days when that is a challenge, although thankfully they are few. 

I’m a happier, more determined, more positive, busier and more giving version of the person I was at 23.  I like who I am at 33 so I think it's time to replace the 23 year old in my head with the 33 year old version of myself.

I am excited for the year ahead, with more travel, new challenges and plenty of ideas and dreams to work on.  I’m going to jump in and tackle it head on.

Do you feel content with the person you are right now?  Do you 'feel' the same age that you are?

Tatum xx